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 i'm not sure what else i can do...

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Rastus

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PostSubject: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Sun Apr 20, 2008 6:50 pm

so i've got this friend..

i've known her for about a year now...and she's just really great.

she live with both of her parents, but doenst have a very good relationship with either. and she told me today that she hasn't been told she's loved in she doesn't know how long.

so i just ask that you guys would pray for her now and then, pray for her strength emotionally, and that she would just feel like she's loved....it would really mean the world to me.

i give her all the support that i can, but that's just not enough right now.
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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Sun Apr 20, 2008 10:36 pm

Perhaps this is too obvious, but you might want to tell her you love her.

Cheers,

Ian
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PeacethroughX

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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Sun Apr 20, 2008 11:19 pm

We will pray, Victor! I love you

Ian's idea is good. There is so many levels of human love and everybody needs to know that they matter and they are loved.

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"Who among the gods is like you, O LORD ?
Who is like you—
majestic in holiness,
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working wonders?"
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Rastus

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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Mon Apr 21, 2008 10:00 am

Ian wrote:
Perhaps this is too obvious, but you might want to tell her you love her.

there's a....rather long story surrounding that issue..we're not like, X's or anything..suffice it to say that it would be..uncomfortable, at the moment.

thanks though Smile
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switchbladeknitter

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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Mon Apr 21, 2008 4:31 pm

But Victor, everyone needs to be told they are loved. There are a hundred different levels and degrees of love maybe you can express you love for her on just one level. I love Jesus and I love Chinese food but they're not the same love.You can give her a little present with a note that says "Jesus loves you and so do I" and I'm sure it would make her day.
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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Tue Apr 22, 2008 8:31 am

i agree, but i know the story and i am telling you that if he just comes out and says "i love you" she might take it the wrong way and then the friendship that is there could be runed. i am praying for you bro.
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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Tue Apr 22, 2008 8:57 am

Hey Victor, How about just a hug....Give her a hug....even people like me respond to hugs.....they are medicine.
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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Tue Apr 22, 2008 8:59 am

yep that would work!!!
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Rastus

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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Tue Apr 22, 2008 9:14 am

Panzer wrote:
Hey Victor, How about just a hug....Give her a hug....even people like me respond to hugs.....they are medicine.

all the time my friend....there's just nothing i can really do, I, and several of her best friends even have tried, methinks it will take something more.

she really just needs to have her parents. but they're too dissapointed in her to see her for what she really is..
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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Tue Apr 22, 2008 9:23 am

I can understand the parent thing...although my parents loved me, they never once told me so or hugged me or anything.....I think I see what you mean.
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headoverheelsforgod88



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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Tue Apr 22, 2008 9:56 am

yea me too, but you know i still love them.
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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Tue Apr 22, 2008 11:22 pm

we never hugged or said i love you in my house either, well not to me just my brother got hugged and said i love you to.
How sad for us all
(((hugs))) for everyone
Victor keep us posted on how things go
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Rastus

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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Wed Apr 23, 2008 3:35 pm

well now her friend has her convinced she has lung cancer Rolling Eyes

i know what she has..i had the same thing a couple years ago, but she's convinced she's gonna die *sigh*
sorta like me, she's only happy if she's miserable about some thing or another.

but emotionally things are looking up.
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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Wed Apr 23, 2008 4:08 pm

well.....we're ALL gonna die.
Some people are able to achieve happiness in just happiness. others (myself included) aren't happy unless there's some kind of drama. I guess sometimes I feel that if everything is too good something bad is gonna happen any minute, but if there's some sort of chaos I know what's wrong and don't have to be on pins and needles waiting for that bad thing.

Good to hear that on the emotional level things are better.
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Tonnenator

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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:37 am

Hey dude maybe instead of saying "I love you" you could say something like:

I care about you
You're one of my best friends
You're awesome
You've been on my heart
I'm praying for you
etc.

Also there are five different 'love languages' and people "speak" different ones. Find out hers, and do it.

The way you know, is, try all five and see what makes her eyes light up, or makes her seem to take notice, etc.

They are:

Words of Affirmation (like I love you, etc)
Acts of Service (doing something special for them)
Receiving Gifts (buying them something you know they like)
Physical Touch (hugs, etc)
Quality Time (spending time with them focusing ALL your energy on them)

Try all these and see which one(s) make her seem to take notice the best.

Then, do that all the time!

I think I know what you mean when you say that saying "I love you" would ruin the friendship.

I remember being 14.

****************************

On a different note..................WOW there are a lot of ppl on this forum whose parents didn't say I love you or hug them! That is messed up and I am so sorry.

My mom hugged me and said I love you so much I got sick of it!

My dad was a different story though but he tried really hard.

To this day, if he so much as calls me to talk to me - I about fall over.
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Rastus

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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Thu Apr 24, 2008 9:12 am

ah-ha!

i was trying to remember those..i used to know 'em

but thanks tonne, we talk alot, she know's i think she's amazing, but with all the negative influence in her life...well, i can't counter act it alone.
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headoverheelsforgod88



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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Fri Apr 25, 2008 8:01 am

i will help you victor....just tell me what to do.
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Rastus

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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Fri Apr 25, 2008 8:36 am

hmm.....how 'bout a shot of arsnic?
xD
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headoverheelsforgod88



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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Fri Apr 25, 2008 11:19 am

hahahahahahah very funny.
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headoverheelsforgod88



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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Fri Apr 25, 2008 11:22 am

no really i want to help....i mean i know i can pray for her...but i want to do more than that.
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Rastus

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PostSubject: Re: i'm not sure what else i can do...   Fri Apr 25, 2008 2:39 pm

much appreciated....as far as physically helping?
iono..she doesn't want to let anyone close to her...it took me months to get her to open up at all.
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