Thanks Jim.
See the thing about professional help is I know, like know that I probably definitely need it.
I know it's not normal to think the thoughts that I do, have the general feelings that I do. I mean I see normal well adjusted people and part of me think - yeah right it's a front they're just better at hiding their madness and the other part of me thinks that I want to be normal and be able to be -gasp- happy.
But you know how much we're on the road so seeing a shrink is hard.
I am definately gonna get that kava kava next time we go home, cuz I need something ya know?